Review: Machete

Plot: When Mexican Federale Machete Cortez's (Danny Trejo) wife and daughter are killed by drug lord Regelio Torrez (Stephen Seagal), Machete is stabbed and left for dead. Three years later having survived the ordeal, Machete is living in Texas as an illegal migrant worker taking jobs where and when he can. When local businessman Michael Booth (Jeff Fahey) hires Machete to kill Texas State Senator John McLaughlin (Robert DeNiro), Machete is double-crossed during the assassination attempt and goes on the run. But as Booth, McLaughlin, and others begin to learn they *&^%ed with the wrong Mexican.

Review: Machete is an over the top, consistently violent, and unapologetic schlock-fest saturated with nudity and cheesy one-liners.

AND I LOVED EVERY MINUTE OF IT!

Similar to blaxploitation films of the 1970s like Slaughter, Dolomite!, and of course Shaft, director Robert Rodriguez's latest movie sojourn manages to balance laughs, action, and social satire with equal aplomb. Machete never takes itself too seriously and that is the beauty of the film. Watching Machete swing out of a hospital window via the disemboweled colon of a his latest victim, having Booth hire assassin Osirus Amanpour through 1-800-HITMAN, or Segal's hilarious death scene are just three of the entertaining moments in Machete simply because they are so ridiculous.

Machete is not surprisingly the strong silent type, a reluctant anti-hero who eliminates his problems through the use of various knives and one-liners like "Machete don't text." Yet he's also someone who cares about the plight of Mexican immigrants, even going so far as to provide Luz (Michelle Rodriguez) with the $150,000 given to him for the McLaughlin assassination to use in her Mexican Underground. Incidentally Luz is also known as She (a hilarious take off on revolutionary Che Gueverra) a revolutionary striving to bring about social justice.

Just like Machete's unexpected philanthropy, I found Machete the movie to contain unexpected social satire. Machete actually has a heart, even if that heart will most likely be cut out by the film's titular character. There are strong social undercurrents surrounding the issue of border security. What's great is that both sides take it to extremes, to the point where the absurdity of the issue becomes apparent. On one side you have idealists like like Luz looking for social justice through an arsenal and an army. On the opposing side you have sadistic fascists like McLaughlin and border patrolman Von Jackson (Don Johnson) who shoot illegal immigrants just for sport. The not so subtle commentary is as funny as it is relevant.

Muchos gracias to cinematographer Jimmy Lindsey as well. His excellent camerawork helped capture classic moments like Machete's Evil Kanevil-esque flight through the air on machine gun wielding motorcycle and a sadistic murder at his brother's church. Mexican rock band Chingon's relentless orgiastic rock beats were also a nice compliment to Lindsey's cinematic style.

About the only weak part of the movie came in the form of Jessica Alba. Pretty she may be but an actress she is not. Her turn as IA agent Sartana Rivera was tepid and boring. Alba's speech to She's army towards the end of the movie is about as inspiring as someone reading the ingredients list on a bottle of Flintstones chewable vitamins. Then again no one one ever said that hot actresses in Hollywood had to be talented.

At 66 years old it is amazing that Trejo could pull off an action film like this. Never underestimate the power of a senior citizen to slice you up though. In the end just like the Bryan Adams song says, Machete "cuts like a knife!"

(Hopefully Trejo won't ever read that last sentence. If so he's likely to cut out my still beating heart and serve it up in a taco.)

My rating: 8/10